Milk and Cookies
by AmazonTurk
Summary: Paine has had it with Brother's obsession with his cousin.  Warning:  Reference to serious Oreo binge.  May cause craving for said sandwich cookies.  This may be classified as a crack fic...but, meh.


**_A/N: Behold! My first ever FFX-2 fic! Since my wonderful and talented friend PrettyGothGirl did a fantastical chapter for me in her fic Peeking (read it and review it...I promise you will LOVE IT!), I have decided to grant her a request. So, here's my very first ever FFX-2 fic, featuring a very underrated couple...Anikki(Brother) and Paine. _**

**_Disclaimer: I own NOTHING! Not even these boxers I'm wearing. They belong to my husband. And Oreo's are a registered trademark of Nabisco._**

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"Give me another, Barkeep," Brother grumbled, slidding his empty glass to the hypello behind the bar. 

"Donnchu shink yoov hads enuff?" he asked in concern, reluctantly pouring more of the liquid into the glass.

Brother stared at his drink, slowing swirling the liquid in the glass and watching as it clung to the sides. He picked up a cream filled chocolate sandwich cookie and dipped it into the milk, watching as bubbles formed around his submerged fingers, liquid displacing air and making the Oreo soft and squishy. "No," he said, stuffing the cookie into his mouth. "I say when I've had enough and I haven't had enough."

"Ohs kay, ohs kay!" Barkeep exclaimed, shaking his hands. "I don'ts wants any troubabibbles."

The doors to the cabin opened with a pscht! of air. Determined clicks of spiked heels could be heard making their way toward the unlikely pair. "Anikki, what the hell are you doing?"

"Go away," he ordered, flailing an arm at the leather clad warrior. "I am sulking."

Paine slapped him upside his head. "Knock it off," she growled. "Buddy's geting sphere waves and Yuna wants to check it out."

Brother sighed heavily, despondantly, his head thumping against the bar counter. "Yuna," he sobbed. "Beautiful Yuna...who I will never see dancing!"

Paine slapped him again. "She's your COUSIN," she snapped. "Your father and her mother were siblings. Yevon, does incest mean anything to you?"

Brother looked up at her. "What is this 'incest' you speak of?" he asked. "Is it a kinky kind of forplay Yuna likes? And how would you know? Have you done things to Yuna?!"

"You disgust me," Paine said rolling her crimson eyes. She leaned down and grabbed his overalls, bringing his face to hers. "You know what you need, Anikki?"

He stared at her, fear showing plainly on his face. "More...cookies?" he ventured.

Paine grinned ferally. "Barkeep, take an hour lunch break...on the deck," she ordered.

"Ohs kay," Barkeep replied without question, padding off the the lift. The doors closed behind him. Paine released Brother and hopped onto the counter, reaching underneath and hitting the button to lock the entrance. (A/N: I'm claiming creative liberties here!)

Paine sneered down at Brother, wrapping her leg around his upper body and pulling herself closer to him until he sat immediately between her legs. She grasped his chin firmly and tilted his face to look up at her. "You know what you need, Anikki?" she asked again, this time drawing at his name with her low, sultry voice.

Brother shook his head, unable to tear his eyes away from her. "Y-you are s-scaring me," he stammered.

She grinned sadistically. "Good," she said, shoving him backwards, chuckling as he tumbled from the stool, leaping off the bar top after him. She stood, straddling him, hip cocked and staring him down. "What you need, Anikki, is to stop thinking about your cousin in romantic ways. It's all right to love her. Just don't _love_ her."

"You are contradicting yourself!" he said. "How can I love her without loving her? You are stupid, Paine!"

Paine smiled evilly again. "Stupid, huh?" she asked, kneeling down to stare into his face again. "We'll just see about that."

She grabbed him up by his clothing again, pulling his face to hers and slamming her lips against his. Her tongue slammed into his mouth as he gasped in shock at her attack, leaving his oral cavitiy vulnerable to invasion. And invade she did. Her tongue molested his, her teeth biting down visciously on his bottom lip. Pushing him down to the floor agian, she straddled his hips, her hands grasping at his ears, toying, albeit harshly, with his many piercings.

They broke from the kiss, him panting for breath and her smirking down at him. "What are you thinking about, Anikki?" she purred.

He fumbled for the buckles on her leather outfit. "How the hell this contraption comes apart!" he exclaimed, pushing his hips up into hers, eager for friction against the bulge in his pants.

Paine chuckled and stood up. "Then my work here is done," she said, leaning over the bar again to unlock the doors to the cabin.

Anikki glared at her in horror. "You cannot leave me here like this!" he yelled. "I'll explode."

Paine smirked and shot him a look over her shoulder that shot straight to his already painfully erect member. "I'm sure you can 'handle' it yourself, Anikki," she said confidently. "And I'll bet the name you cry out as you come will be mine...not Yuna's."

She walked out of the cabin and down the hall to the lift, each click of her heels a stab of straight lust into his groin. Brother's head hit the floor hard and he groaned, a smile playing on his lips. "It always is...Paine."

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**A/N: Woot! I did it! You like? You hate? You like...I'm happy. You hate...you're entitled to your opionion...so GIVE IT TO ME! Review, review, review.**


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